Princess Leia Wagon Wheels Finally Explained

The Princess Leia LEGO wig and the writings of Carl Jung are two products that can improve your brain health. They are manufactured by the first and second happiest countries in the world.

 

UPSTAIRS COLLEGE — Local researchers have discovered that Princess Leia’s iconic cinnamon bun hairdo is modeled on two large holes in the human brain. “The braided wheels are actually a volumetric analogue of the lateral ventricles” explained Dr. Noname (no-Nah-may). “We all have them. They are part of a system that washes the brain with special brain juice — the brain’s bidet. It’s most active when we sleep. This cosmotological analogue boosts it’s performance.”

But how to sleep, or do much of anything, with two party donuts strapped to your head? “Some other person wears them, Carrie Fisher or me, not you” said Dr. Pinky Leiago. “You see them on someone else and unconsciously imagine them on yourself.  At a deep level you remember your own lateral ventricles. You feel good about them, not consciously, but the ventricles know you’re thinking about them and they do their job a little better. It’s not unlike a gentleman  seeing an F-Dodge-Ram-500 pickup truck and being unconsciously reminded of his organ. Princess Leia Organa’s donuts work in a similar way.”

Upstairs College has submitted a brief on Organa’s Donuts to the Jung Institute in Zürich. “It’s new broken up ground” said Dr. Leiago. “We think Zürich will agree that Organa’s Donuts should be included in the official cannon of Jungian archetypes.”

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